I was just reading the lastest post on The Reign of Ellen (http://www.thereignofellen.blogspot.com/), as I often do and today's subject is how her daughter is about to celebrate her first birthday, how much life has changed in that year and how thankful Ellen is for her daughter and being a mother. And then she apologizes for being schmoopy, because, well, that's just Ellen.
As I poured myself a glass of wine, thinking it over, I couldn't help but wonder, (god I feel like an unhip version of Carrie Bradshaw) shouldn't we be sending our mothers gifts on our birthdays? I mean, it's really her anniversary of becoming a mother, and I'm given to understand that most women long to be mothers. So why don't we give her gifts on the date of our births? Considering the two tasks, we had the lighter burden. She schlepped us around for 9 months, gained weight, lost sight of her ankles, had to wear truely ugly clothing and was often sick. Let us not forget the strange phenomanon of perfect strangers feeling up her belly. And that's before she even goes into labor. Our job was to sleep, eat, and nudge into a more comfortable position, then show up in a rush of pain and fluids I cannot begin to describe. And how do we greet her? Screaming and wailing until we latch on to her nipple, where we stay for the next several months. We wake her up in the middle of the night crying and hollaring for more boob time and we only shut up when she finally concedes defeat. (It's a bit like dating actually) She should be celebrated on our birthdays for putting up with us, for not smothering us with fluffy teddy bear embroidered pillows, for not letting us play in the street even though she really could have cared less that one afternoon. We've got it all backwards. On Mother's Day, we should get a thank you, on our birthdays she should be getting the thank you, shouldn't she? I like that idea actually. I think I'll start doing that. I expect the groundswell movement to begin any day now.
2 comments:
Look at it this way B. I didn't ask to be born. It was mom and pop who wanted to have me. So it is actually a gift (yes, I'm a great gift) she wanted to have. It is like when a young kid saves up their allowance for months to buy that Talleywacker 5000 to show off to all their friends in school. Moms save up for nine months and when they have put up with enough struggle, they get their gift to show off to the world. Alright, that was a poor comparison, but I'm not giving up my choco cake damn it!
I'd never ask you to Vaz. Well, not you personally anyway.
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